Stop the pressure and start living!

We put a lot of pressure on ourselves in general. To excel in our professional lives, to be the perfect parent, to be a great spouse, a great friend, to ensure we’re healthy and doing all the right things for our mind and body. It’s exhausting!!! “Let’s make it the best year ever!!!” puts a lot of pressure on ourselves! As we settle into January I’m sure we’ve all thought about our goals for the year, perhaps reflected on the year past, what we did or didn’t do, and perhaps create some new goals or intentions for the year. Now before you say “Oh another blog about goals - next!” this is NOT that. This is a way to refocus your goals. To set intentions instead of big unrealistic goals that only make you feel bad about yourself, and to give you ideas on how you can reframe your goals to fit your individual needs and lifestyle. 

Here are some fun facts for you about resolutions.

• 3 in 10 Americans make a resolution each year

• 62% of people feel pressure to make a resolution (argh there’s that darn pressure again!)

• 80% of people actually don’t follow through with their resolutions

• 42% of people are more likely to follow through with their goals if they’re written down

Now here’s the thing - resolutions are sort of outdated. Things like  “I’m going to get healthier this year!”, “I’m going to workout more!”,  “I’m going to relax more!”, (sound familiar?). These are such BIG goals with no real direction. What does that actually mean to get healthier? What about working out? And what is relaxing to you? We create these huge goals with no real pathway to get there - which is why half the time we don’t follow through with them.

Here are a few ideas for you as you start to think about this upcoming year.

Meet yourself where you are. Are you coming off an injury? Are you moving or starting a new job? Any other big life change? Perhaps now is not the time to start that new workout routine if you’re in the middle of a big life change - or perhaps it is! Only you know what you can handle. So meet yourself where you are instead of biting off more than you can chew and just setting yourself up for failure. Be realistic and set a behavior change that will support you in your current situation and not add more stress. 

Keep it small. We all want to get healthier and there are a million things we can do in order to get healthier, but realistically we just can’t do it all. So think of ONE SMALL thing you can do to add to your lifestyle that could be healthier. A few ideas:

1. Add more greens to my meals

2. Drink an additional 24oz of water a day

3. Go to sleep an hour earlier at night

4. Stop working at “x” time 

5. Take a walk after dinner

Be consistent. Once you picked your small action item - keep doing it. The only way to make a behavior stick is by actually doing it, and doing it often. Get it into your life consistently before you add anything else. Once it becomes a habit, you’ll be ready to add more.

There will be a setback. It’s inevitable that setbacks will happen. So plan for that. You’ll get sick and not workout for a week, or perhaps you’ll be traveling and unable to cook for a bit. Whatever the setback is, don’t let it completely derail you. Let whatever is holding you back pass, and then get back to it without judgement. Beating yourself up does nothing but hold you back and make you feel bad about yourself thus further creating a setback or worse making you give up all together! Give yourself the time you need to get back on track.

Give yourself time. New behaviors are not created overnight. You need to work consistently at them to make them stick. So be patient, give yousrelf grace and take your time to get it into your life. 

It’s okay to change your goal. Wait what? That means I’m giving up! Nope. Life changes, so can your goals. Maybe something has changed in your life where this goal is no longer appropriate or no longer fits in your lifestyle. That is okay. Switch it up, make sure it’s in line with your intentions on how you want to live your life and them resume! It’s okay for things to change - be open to it and resilient.

Here’s a real life situation for you. 

My goal after cancer was to get stronger, and resume my workouts once I recovered from my surgery and treatment. Now, that took TIME and PATIENCE… but then something happened - we decided to have a second child (yay!). So, my goal has changed. I am super strong, but my intention for getting strong is different now. My body is changing yet again and it’s no longer in my control for the time being. So that is something that I need to accept - I’m growing a baby so it makes sense!  I can’t do what I normally do for workouts, but that doesn’t mean I can’t workout. My goal for working out is different now. Instead of just getting stronger and being able to lift and dance and do all the things I used to do - now it is prepping for child birth ( a workout in itself!!). I didn’t give up - I just adjusted accordingly based on my lifestyle! After I give birth - my goal will change again! Being open to this change helps me keep my mind straight and intentions clear. 

Hopefully these guidelines help encourage you to make healthier lifestyle choices for yourself that are realistic and make sense for where you are in life! Wishing you a very happy and fulfilling new year!!!